“Zoom” – which before the last year
mostly meant to “move fast” – has taken on a whole new meaning. Prior to the
Pandemic, thirty to forty percent of my work with clients was via Zoom. When
the Quarantine hit in full force, naturally, 100% of my work pivoted to Zoom. Video
conferencing became one of the most talked about topics among colleagues. I
attended several (Zoom) meetings about whether we “could” and “how to” hold
Zoom mediations. I felt lucky – it was already a platform that I’d been using
and I felt pretty comfortable at it.
A year
later, as we contemplate some sort of return to in-person work, I have been
thinking about the look of my “new office” – virtual, in-person, a hybrid? Part
of my cogitating has been about what face-to-face mediations looked like before
the Quarantine, and also about how Zoom mediations have offered different,
useful, perspectives. I haven’t done an
empirical study (after all, I’m a mediator, not a scientific researcher) but
based on anecdotal observations, what I have noticed is that when I’m helping
people work through some difficult conflicts, when emotions are very high, working
in the Zoom Room actually seems to be more effective than working face-to-face
in my (lovely) office setting. When Zooming from different rooms – brought magically
together through the video conferencing platform – in the safety and comfort
of their own spaces, people seem to be able to access their emotions much
easier than if the “source of the conflict” is sitting three feet away from them,
breathing the same air, taking up the same space. The distance afforded by the
Zoom Room seems to give people greater tolerance for the emotional spikes that
are inevitable – both for the other person and in themselves. I have noticed
that as difficult emotional conversations are unfolding, people in the Zoom Room seem to
be able to breathe and hear the words which the other person is speaking, instead
of simply reacting to the words (which is of course a very common human
behavior). Perhaps that nanosecond delay in the video conferencing software provides
some literal breathing room, which helps defuse emotional tensions….
I’m
still evaluating what the “post-Pandemic” reality of my mediation practice will
look like. Of course, I will be taking into account the prevailing public
health recommendations (which at this point are not wholly embracing fully
unrestricted in-person meetings). I am
going to also be very mindful of how video conferencing might actually offer something
better than in-person, old style, mediations. At the very least, I think that
video mediations have provided an effective – unexpected – benefit that can be
very helpful to clients. And, as this last year living through the Pandemic has
taught us in no uncertain terms…the future is hard to predict and is wide open
with possibilities….
If you have any questions about how mediation might work
in your situation, please reach out to me: karen@karenjusterhecht.net or
510.210.3796…and in the meantime, I hope that you are staying well and feeling
hopeful about your future!
